So many pundits and paid thinkers do end-of-the-year thoughtful essays, and it's time someone who knows to write what is really going to happen.

Nothing. Nothing will change in the year 2000. People will still be mean to each other, resolutions will fly out the window long before February. The only thing to count on at the turn of the year is tax reminders.

Now, this may seem Grinchly, but just think -- has anything ever changed because of January 1? We get a little older, sometimes a little wiser, more often just more stressed, with less time to spend with those we love and a bigger bite taken out of our paychecks courtesy of those morons in power.

It is the year 2000, and we still are no closer to having a woman president, world peace or an end to AIDS, global warming, pollution, poverty, homelessness and the common cold. The Red Sox have still not won the World Series. There are still people who cannot read. Television still is brain candy.

In case this is just too depressing, there are some good things that happen at the turn of the year.

I'll let you know when I think of them.

[ by Beth Derochea ]