As I read the preface and opening statement of the book "My God, I'm Hit!", where author Brian David Andersen raises the question whether John F. Kennedy was truly assassinated or not on Nov. 22, 1963, I kept wondering if he was going to say Kennedy could be found playing cards somewhere with Elvis Presley. While that was not the case (probably because they "died" so many years apart), some readers might think Andersen's theories are just as far-fetched. In short, Andersen postulates that Kennedy was forced to fake his assassination for numerous reasons and lived out his final days in western Russia.

The style of the book is supposed to be read like a court dramatization of sorts. The reader gets to see testimony from a variety of witnesses. Andersen presents "evidence" to prove his theories as if he were a lawyer with the job of proving Kennedy did not die by the hands of Lee Harvey Oswald, but rather left the office of President to live the rest of his life in secret. The reader/juror is supposed to make up his own mind -- guided by Andersen's interpretation of events -- as to whether or not JFK truly died in Dallas.

Many of you may be asking yourself why would JFK abdicate? According to Andersen, there are many, many reasons that include:
• JFK's health. He had Addison's disease, old injuries, incurable VD, prescription and non-prescription drug addictions.
• "By 1960, the United States of America was ruled and operated by a committee not elected or known by the citizenry."
• Jackie was having an affair with Aristotle Onassis.
• JFK was having his own affairs -- with Florence Pritchett and Mary Pinochet (who got him hooked on LSD).
• Something about Cardinal Spellman, who was indoctrinated by the "Black Pope" rather than the one in Rome. Andersen keeps stating for the juror to "look it up" rather than give background on things the juror might not already know about.
• Joseph Kennedy, JFK's father, called in favors to get his son elected, and JFK didn't feel he truly deserved the office.
• LBJ
• The "Powers-That-Be" knew JFK was about to address concerns with fluoridating water that would impact certain corporate profits.
• JFK wanted out of the public scene "in the worst way by any means possible."
• JFK knew the upcoming moon landings were going to be faked and didn't want to be associated with this lie.
• The "Powers-That-Be" were pissed at JFK for signing "Executive Order 11110 that returned the power of creating money to the U.S. Treasury Department." This would take power back from the Federal Reserve System a "private, for profit, central banking corporation owned by a cartel of private banks."

I probably missed a couple reasons because I sometimes got lost with all the conspiracy theories mentioned in this book. I know Howard Hughes is mentioned as being four brothers, not one man. The captain of the Titanic sank the ship on purpose. The Twin Towers were brought down by explosives set by the United States government. Even The X-Files gets a nod.

I had a hard time maintaining the threads of connection with many of these items to the Kennedy "abdication by fake assassination." However, that might be because I would be considered one of the "brainwashed," according to Andersen. I was also surprised that with all of his other "proof," Andersen does not mention Nostradamus quatrain 6-37, which believers know references the Kennedy assassination. Wait, never mind. The quatrain is "proof" of assassination, not abdication.

Andersen often contradicts himself as he presented "evidence." For example, he harps on the "fake" Zapruder film and shows pictures from that film where he says the Stemmons Freeway sign was drawn in by Hollywood artists. Yet, he later has a picture taken by Hugh Betzner Jr., taken from across the street, that shows Zapruder while he was filming on abdication day. The Stemmons Freeway sign is seen and would have been in the path of Zapruder's filming as the Kennedy car passed. Maybe the Z-film and the Betzner picture were both faked!

Andersen also makes statements of fact that may or may not be the case. "The criminal omission and failure of not creating crime scenes are hard, absolute, concrete and undeniable proof a conspiracy took place in Dallas before and after JFK arrived and departed Texas for the last time." Andersen may be right. Or, maybe it is simply proof of an incompetent police department suffering the same shock as the rest of the American public.

By the end of that fateful episode in history, there were two fake dead bodies, according to Andersen -- one for JFK, one for Oswald. The Z-film was faked by animators. Doctors were involved at the hospital. The Vatican and the Black Pope were involved. The CIA was involved. The conspiracy was huge! And everybody kept their mouths shut for fear of being killed for real. OK ... to quote from the book, "Eliminate the far-fetched, crazy and impossible and what remains is the truth however improbable." Therefore, I removed most of Andersen's theories on fake abdication and was left with a dead president. Whether there was a conspiracy or not on some level remains open, but I was not convinced by Andersen that Kennedy's death was faked.

Within only a couple pages, I thought Andersen was in desperate need of an editor. He mentions one, but there are still a ton of spelling and punctuation mistakes. Before long, I realized he also needed a writer. Regardless of how good (or bad) his ideas about the Kennedy assassination may be, Andersen cannot write very well. He has a very hard time putting coherent thought to paper. As such, I was not convinced that he proved his case -- even with what Andersen calls the "Rosetta Stone" of this investigation -- the diary of eyewitness June Dishong. I am only one jury member, however. He just very well might convince you.

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