If you've spent years yearning to see a woman masturbate to the images of spooky 3-D clowns while sitting in a pool of her own urine, then, brother, Frightworld is your perverted dream come true. For the rest of us, Frightworld is -- at best -- 103 minutes of pure cinematic torture.

It's a pity because the film does have a unique hook -- it was filmed in Buffalo at Eerie Production's Frightworld, "a dark ride amusement featuring five different haunted houses, live costumed actors and state of the art special lighting and sound effects." Having access to one of the country's most popular haunted attractions obviously helped the filmmakers out budget-wise, but I don't think the scares of "Frightworld the Amusement" transfer over very well to film. I found the abundance of visual effects (flashing sequences of images, strobing lights, etc.) more annoying than anything else, but at least now I better understand why the film was shot in this manner.

Speaking of annoyances, there's the loud heavy metal soundtrack that, on a number of occasions, drowned out some of the film's dialogue. That's not necessarily a bad thing, though, as said dialogue is so bad that I couldn't help but wince at some of the characters' lines, especially early on when the cast apparently set out to break the Guinness world record for the most lame sexual innuendoes crammed into a single scene.

What about the gore, you ask? There's definitely plenty of blood and gore to go around, I'll grant you that, but I didn't find it exceedingly realistic (especially when it came in the form of extended minutes of flashing images).

After a bloody introduction to Verden Fell (Gary Marzolf), a serial killer of 29 victims cut down in the prime of his murderous life, we join Jack (Andrew Roth) and a group of his exceedingly non-conformist friends in the warehouse holding all of the goodies from the famed Frightworld amusement park of yesteryear (which just so happens to be the location where Verden Fell died). Jack is set to reopen the place in a couple of weeks, and we are among the first to endure his grand tour of the environs. Of course, these crazy kids can't go too long without stopping to get drunk, smoke the biggest doobies on the planet and -- of course -- pair off in couples to fornicate. By this point, you're halfway through this overly long movie and -- if you're like me -- seriously considering pulling all of your hair out, downing a bottle of drain cleaner and running stark naked out into the night in the grips of utter madness.

Finally, and not a moment too soon, the killing begins, and the movie actually becomes almost watchable. I found a number of the murders somewhat confusing, though. When I clearly see X kill Y, I can't help but be confused when the body, when discovered, ends up being that of X rather than Y. On top of that, I know there's some sort of soul transference thing going on, but that's just one of many aspects of this film that doesn't work very well at all, in my opinion.

It's difficult to figure out which is worse: the script or the acting -- but I'll go with the acting. With characters saddled with such names as Albino, Acid Poptart, Sick Boy and Susie Creamcheese, you don't expect Oscar-caliber acting, but Marzolf is the only actor in the entire cast who just might be able to act his way out of a dark room with a flashlight. I have to believe that Creamcheese girl is either a heroin addict or else she is physically unable to open her mouth when speaking, as you can't understand a word she slurs. The director only adds to the film's problems with some of the worst transitions from one scene to another I've ever seen.

I feel sort of bad for laying into this movie so viciously, as I appreciate writer/director David R. Williams' attempt to give the world another wonderfully gory horror movie, but the sad truth is that Frightworld just isn't very good in any way, shape, or form.